Friday, May 27, 2011

Cami Blues

So, I finally remembered how to get back into this website. It took a long time! I had to seriously re-learn everything, like how to text, and that the bathroom isn't called the head, and that I don't need to scream, "Good morning, Sir!!!" at every civilian I see. Cause they think that's weird. And it is.

At the end of this post, I'll put some pictures of my life these days. It's pretty exciting. Every morning lately, I wake up and think, 'wow! I'm really here, in the military!' It's been a pretty awesome ride so far.

A few days ago, I had a really rough reminder of what I left behind. A dash of pain, and a wave of anger when I read some texts between family members. Since boot camp, I've been so caught up in the total chaos of becoming a Sailor, that I've had not even a little time to dwell on the life I left behind. And it's been soooo refreshing. I finally see what all my friends back home saw. I was letting the issues around me suck the life out of me.

So when I recieved the reminder of what I'm missing out on, I instantly felt a rush of panic. Why can I not fit into my natural family? How is it that people can so obviously do horrible things, and then turn them around so it's my fault? And blah, blah, blah, the same old song again.

Luckily, that's not me anymore. The instant I began to stress, I was surrounded by shipmates. They asked what was wrong, forced me to admit that I'm an adult now, making my own choices, and made me laugh. Since then, I haven't stressed over it.

So... here's what's new. I graduated out of a 900 division. Those are the performing arts divisions. 925 was State Flags, and I have to admit, it was worth the extra hours we put in Saturdays and Thursdays. I got to carry the Utah flag for our graduation.

After I graduated, I packed my 75 lb. seabag and left at 3am from Recruit Training Command in Chicago. I landed in Atlanta in the afternoon, saw a Starbucks and went ballistic. Drank about five frappes and ran around wildly for about 4 hours. Got on a plane to Pensacola. We got off the plane wearing our peacoats and started cooking alive! The smell of the ocean put me over the edge. I cried out of overwhelming joy all the way to base, along with a couple other people. That resulted in me getting a migraine, so I don't remember much about checking in. What I do know is that boot camp was an experience I will never forget, and some of the memories are awesome, but I NEVER want to go back and I'm so glad it's over.

Now I'm waiting to start classes. I have my security clearance, got all moved in, and made some pretty cool new friends. And... that's all for now...