Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Stress Busters and Imminent Proposals

Spring is an unachievable goal. Less than 6 months away, but it feels like my world is destined to remain hidden beneath packed down dirty snow. You know it's pathetic when you see a 2 foot pile of snow by your front door and think, 'this isn't so bad!' because it's 3 feet shorter than it was 2 weeks ago!

I would love to be warm again. A constant warm, even hot would be okay, days when all you want to do is run outdoors, bare feet on the new grass, or in puddles of fresh rainfall, skin exposed to the warmth of the sun. Mmm.

I hate not being in some control of situations. Specifically, occasions involving a question that will affect me for life. Such occasions hopefully happen only once, and it's tradition to remain a complete mystery to the female of a couple, until the 'stallion' makes the move. Haha that sounds funny how I worded it, but I can't think of a better way to say it. Point made in a short, random, funny sentence. How charming can I be? Honestly though, at least a timeline would be nice. A little more of a timeline than 'soon'. Grr.

Angel's 5 Tips on how to Ease the Mind

1. Have a substantial amount of finances tucked away in a bank account. This always makes me feel much less stressed. I don't care if you rob a bank. Some other people might care though. Just don't rob Dominoes Pizza. As long as you have money in the account, you might feel more relaxed.

2. Cook something. At least it's good to know, when all your life is spiraling out of control and certain men aren't telling you when they plan to ask you a life altering question, and woodwind instruments aren't made out of wood thus failing your theory and ruining your grades, and mom is revealing information about your past that makes you want to seriously die, and friends are too self absorbed to care...anyway, when life is unexpected, how comforting is it to know that you can mix flour, sugar, oil, eggs, peanut butter and baking soda and come up with peanut butter cookies? It's a way of remaining in charge, which lets your guard down, easing your worries.

3. Finish your homework on time. Better yet, don't get yourself into the position of having homework in the first place. How about skip school and live an uneducated life? You know what they say, 'ignorance is bliss'. Bliss sounds carefree to me. You can take this advice or leave it...

4. Get involved with a sport, preferably martial arts. It doesn't make sense to me. How I can go storming off to Hapkido in a rage, kick the crap out of a bag and deal with annoying boys who think they are better than anyone else, and come away from that feeling RELAXED??? Happy, even? But I do! Haha, I never said I wasn't weird.

5. If all else fails, and only then, drugs and alcohol will do the trick. Try the alcohol first, it gets you in less trouble, especially if you are over 21 like I am. For starters, take a fruity shot or two, like X-rated or Peach schnapps. Then move on to a few carrot cake shots, which involve butterscotch flavored alcohol (I now dub the genius who invented butterscotch flavored alcohol as my almighty god and king). And finally, take some Southern Comfort. Make sure to have some chasers like soda handy, cause that stuff burns. After that, do whatever the hell you want to. You can go for hardcore stuff, like everclear, and eventually puke your guts out and die. Or you could take a cheesecake shot, which is Vanilly McGillicuddy's and cranberry juice, and stare in awe at the glass for 2 hours while exclaiming how much like cheesecake it tasted. Or, you could have a Monster or red bull and charge around town, bouncing off brick walls and throwing yourself off buildings, playing Superman. Whichever way you go, I guarantee you will be worry free and relaxed.

I'm not a very good influence. I know. But when you have my life, you need stress busters. I didn't give you my personal favorite method of worry relievers, which involves a blade and neosporin. That's because I do have standards, and I am not trying to give you ideas that will ruin your life. I am the big sister to 6 kids. I learned to hide my less-acceptable ideas and encourage nice ways of solving problems. And stress itself is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness.

Blah blah blah, I just talked a lot. Bored myself to tears, actually. Watching paint dry would be more fun than thinking of ways to relieve stress. I'm going to go scrapbook and have a drink.

4 comments:

Grace said...

Aww :) Congrats on the imminent "situation". Try not to stress too much, I was thinking of too many things on the day Z proposed to me, and now I can't remember what was said!!!

Oh, and an awesome stress buster is getting a back, neck or head massage. <3 <3 <3

Angel Renee said...

Thank you Grace! I LOVE massages... I should get one. I'm trying to relax about the situation. :)

Grace said...

If you don't mind someone on the other side of the world being so nosy, what is stressing you out about it all? The not knowing when such a momentous question is going to be asked?


(And do you have a ring yet?)

Angel Renee said...

It is stressful, mostly because I am usually a little bit in control of situations, and in this case I'm not. Plus when I am caught by surprise, I usually have really strange reactions to things. I don't want to be asked in public and think he's kidding, and embarrass myself! haha